I'm Still Alive and Here Are the Weekly Features to Prove It

It's been awhile since the weekly features were updated.  How long?  I'm not sure as self-regulation has not exactly been a strength of mine lately.  But that's all water under the bridge because today the features are brand new and there will be more content coming.  Exciting, right?  Temper your excitement for a moment and let's get to the top five things I love (hate) about Autumn...

5. Darkess later in the morning (and sooner in the evening) - I like that it's still dark in the mornings, especially because I work an overnight shift.  I get to rush home in the morning and crawl into bed while the sun is still hidden on the other side of the earth.  However, by the time I wake up I only have two or three hours of daylight left.

4. (shrunken) Sweaters - The crisp Autumn air is my favorite of the year and I relish looking over my sweater drawer and deciding which I will pull over my head to go out and meet the day.  Then I have to struggle to squeeze my melon through the neck hole and stretch out the sleeves for the next few hours.

3. Thanksgiving (aftermath) - One of my favorite holidays because it's all about stuffing yourself, which for some reason leaves me feeling bloated and stuffed afterward.  Weird.

2. School (drop off) - Having the house nice and quiet during the school year while my kids are gone feels nice.  Waking up to take them there instead of staying hidden under the nice warm blankets?  Not so much.

1. (wet) Leaves - The colors of Autumn might be the best, most iconic aspect of the season.  The difficulty of picking them up after they've had time to sit out in a cold rain might be the worst.

This week's cool-ass thing you will never own is your own urban farm.  Live in the city?  Love eating tomatoes, cucumbers, spinach and kale (gag) but hate having to pay out the nose for organic produce at your local grocery store?  How about building your own farm?  All you need is soil, seeds, hoses, sprinklers, a greenhouse, some fans and a whole buttload of space.  Thinking about making one on your roof?  I hope it's not over your bedroom.

This week's sign you are a nerd is that you read books about comic books.  I'm currently crawling through Supergods by Grant Morrison in an attempt to look more serious and explain away the perception that comic books are kid stuff by reading an extremely wordy (though entertaining) argument.  I could have read so many comics in the meantime.

This week's nemesis is game updates.  Just as I started to find my comfort zone with Minecraft on the 360 and catch up to my kids' learning curve, they go and change the whole set up.  Now I have to sit through tutorials from my eight and nine year old sons.  Not at all patronizing.

This week's lesson learned is not to name the email folder that you are trying to hide online gift receipts in "Secret."  Finally, the Lego Minecraft sets are in stock so you order a few and plan on hiding them until Christmas rolls around.  Maybe you manage to intercept the package at the door and hide it in the crawl space.  But when your kid borrows your smartphone and goes poking around, they are going to figure out that the toys you received the delivery confirmation for are most likely not for you.  GFuess who is headed straight for the crawl space?

This week's analysis diagrams the evolution of the in game avatar:

Finally, this week's Star Wars quote is, "The last remnants have been swept away."

Full Length Weekly Features

I don't know about you, but with the commercials proliferating the television, I am becoming very excited for next month's release of Pixar and Disney's new film Wreck It Ralph.  So, to help whet my appetite for retro video games gone CGI, we have decided to start this week's features with the top five feature length Pixar films up to this point:

5. The Incredibles - An underrated volume in Pixar's collection, the adventures of the Parr family and their struggle to both mask and accept their exceptional abilities did just as much to make this movie enjoyable as the fast paced, epic battle scenes.

4. Toy Story 2 - A more enjoyable, funnier storyline in my humble opinion, but the ground work had already been laid by the original, which deserves more props.

3. Up - The most visually dynamic and outright beautiful of the Pixar films, it was the first to take full (and i do mean full) advantage of 3D.

2. Finding Nemo - Not only were the colors in it amazing, alternating from the full color coral reef to the grayish, hazy depths, but the story is one that a dad can't help but get choked up by every time he views it...or forces his kids to view it with him on Father's Day.

1. Toy Story - Know your roots.  The classic that revolutionized the animated feature will more than likely always be TGD's favorite Pixar film.

Delayed Features

After a busy weekend with the kids, filled with Autumn activities (there may have been a pumpkin patch, apple orchard and state park involved) something had to be trimmed from my schedule and, like usual, the weekly features suffered as a result.  But two days late is better than never and we start this week's features by anticipating next week's arrival of The Walking Dead: Season 3.  While I think the show has done a pretty good job overall (almost as good as the comic version) there have been a few frustrating portrayals of zombie characteristics that have irked me.  So, the top five list will be the top five errors in zombie portrayal in television and film:

5. How do they not eat one another? - I get that every death of natural causes results in another zombie. I get that they bite the occasional victim who manages to then make good their escape only to be turned over to side of the zombie hordes later.  I get this increases their numbers.  What I don't understand is how, in moments of no other food source, how they just don't start taking bites off one another.

4. Strength - Can a normal human of average strength rip open the torso of another living human and disembowel them?  No.  How then can a half-rotted, muscularly-atrophied walking corpse find the arm strength to do so?

3. Speed - I am going to make a singular, simple bold statement upon which all zombie portrayals should be based: Zombies cannot run!  Everyone knows that the way they catch you is not by chasing you down, but by your allowing yourself to get surrounded or trip over some inevitable obstacle which breaks your leg and immobilizes you.  The following words are acceptable to describe zombie movement: hobbling, limping, lumbering, lurching, shuffling, shambling, stumbling, hobbling, walking.

2. Problem-solving - When a zombie sees you behind a window, it walks head first into that window.  It does not look around for a different way to get in or pick up something to smash the window with.  the only way that window will be broken and the zombie will gain access will be if enough others congest behind it and break the window through sheer pressure of their combined weight against it.

1. Facial expressions - Far too many times I have seen a mindless corpse glance at its potential prey and either narrow its eyes or flash an evil smile.  There should be no emotion whatsoever on the part of any zombie.  No happiness over discovering an unprotected, vulnerable meal, only the instinctive registration of a food source that results in a change of direction at the same speed previously attained toward said food source.  Also, it should be hard to smile when the zombie's lips rotted off weeks ago.

WTF - Weekly Timed Features

I've been spending a lot of time in the TGDRGM and watching the exploits of S.H.I.E.L.D. on The Avengers, then I come to find out through our friends at Today in Geek History that today marked the premiere of M.A.S.K. back in 1985 so it only seems natural that this week's features would begin with our top five super villain acronyms...

5. A.I.M. - Advanced Idea Mechanics one of Marvel Comics' recurring nefarious organizations and I firmly believe the inspiration for the yellow suits worn by the CDA in Monsters, Inc.

Decide for yourself

 

4. COBRA - Many don't realize that G.I. Joe's main nemesis...actually, the only nemesis I ever recall them facing.  How is that possible?  Anyway, the name COBRA actually stood for COnversion by Blackmail, Revolution and Anarchy.  They really forced that one in there.

3. CAW - The only reason that Criminal Alliance of the World makes this list is thourgh situational irony because they were adversaries to Hawkman in a DC Comics' story arc.  CAW!  Ca-CAW!  Get it?

2. MODOK - This is not only one of Marvel's freakier and yet somehow also comedic looking villains, but it begs the question of which came first, the drawing of the armed and legged giant head or the name, Mental Organism Designed Only for Killing?

1. VENOM - But the inspiration for the week's list the Vicious Evil Network of Mayhem takes the top spot for two reasons.  First, I don't remember what the MASK stood for and second because any villains who are that redundant must be extra committed to their evilness...and viciousness...and the causing of mayhem.

All New Features

Sure, you know about the panoramic photo option and the larger screen, but our weekly features plan on revealing some of the lesser known iPhone 5 features to all of you in order to help assist you in making your decision about whether to update or not...

5. Invisibility cloak app - This is only available with the 5.  You can't just update the operating system on your 4 or 4S and expect to sneak into the ladies locker room unnoticed.

4. The auto-correct now improves your Facebook posts - Having a hard time coming up with something clever but feel like it's been to long since you last posted a status?  Don't worry.  The spell check engine has been expanded to recognize lame posts about your family pet and change them into trendy song lyrics that totally express your attitude on life.

3. Siri wakes you up to talk - Your high tech personal assistant has become a little more pushy on its way to evolving into GLaDOS.  If you haven't used Siri for 48 hours, it will wait until you have just begun to fall asleep then sigh and ask aloud, "Why don;t you talk to me anymore?"

2. The new adapter conceals a sonic screwdriver - The iPhone 5 requires a new plug.  This has resulted in a great gnashing of teeth amongst loyal customers who have all sorts of old plug accessories.  What they aren't telling you is that Apple has decided to reward the adapter purchasers with their own version of the Time Lord's handy dandy tool.

1. Google no longer secretly monitors your movements through the maps icon...Apple does - It's one thing to watch my every move, but it's another to allow an outside corporation to do it.  Kudos to Apple for finally being its own Big Brother.

This week's cool-ass thing you will never own is this retro-video game room which I mentioned earlier in the week...

Remaking Our Weekly Features

I’m a day late, as usual, updating the weekly features so let’s dive right in.

There have been so many unlikely movie remakes lately.  Some reboot, like The Amazing Spider-Man or Clash of the Titans while some seek to fix the mistakes of the first attempt like Total Recall and Dredd 3D.  There are even more currently in the works which seem like curious decisions doomed for disaster like Robocop and Red Dawn.  Since no one in Hollywood wants to listen to our advice to slow down with the rehashing, we have decided to suggest a few more movies that we would like to see reworked.  Here is our top five:

5. Fantastic Four – Forget the orange suit and do for the Thing what The Avengers did for the Hulk, CGI.  Also, let’s get some more intense fight scenes and a real Galactus, not just a dust cloud hovering in space to make Marvel's first family respectable comic heroes again.

4. Demolition Man – The over-scientific, over-regulated future seems to be a hot theme again and maybe you could get Sting to do another title song.  You forgot about that horrible tune until just now, didn’t you?

3. Ghost Rider – Cast someone who is not Nicolas Cage as Johnny Blaze and it’s sure to be better.

2. Masters of the Universe – We’ve watched Transformers, we’ve seen (and hated) G.I. Joe (thus far), so what other classic 80s toy needs a remake film?  He-Man, fools!  The old movie was barely recognizable as being related to the toy line, so this time, whoop it up with the somehow in the future but also in the medieval past dichotomy.  Confuse everyone.  Speaking of confusing everyone, the biggest thing missing that must be added to a new version can be summed up in two words: fuzzy underpants.

1. Weekend at Bernie’s – Want to take an old movie and capitalize on the latest craze?  I’m surprised nobody has thought of this.  Make Bernie a zombie.  Annnnnnnd, action!

Opening Weekly Features

Since I spent most of my day staring at the TV and screaming at it in hopes of influencing the outcome of my favorite team's game (which I am pretty sure worked), I figure I ought to be productive and update the features as well.

This week's top five list consists of my start of the season NFL picks to win it all.  this year, I am leaving nothing to chance:

5. Chicago Bears

4. Bears

3. Da Bears

2. The Monsters of the Midway

1. A certain team from a town known for its wind and whose team is destined to achieve the status it once held under da great Mike Ditka, a team that will lead the league on both sides of the field dis year, also known as...Daaaaaa Bears.

This week's cool-ass thing you will never own is the football with which you scored your first NFL touchdown.  Certainly you see more rookies coming in and making immediate impact with their teams, often in their very first game, these years.  Still, you would have to make it to the NFL to begin with, which means you better hit the gym...and become way more athletic somehow.

This week's sign you are a nerd is that you correct the nearby fan who is singing the fight song incorrectly.  You may have leaned over and politely said, "Pardon me, but it is, 'What though the odds,' not, 'Although the odds.'"  Or perhaps you told someone whom you thought was as anal about such things as you are, "Every play doesn't make the way for victory, it clears it."  Truth is no matter how polite or academic your approach, you sound like a lame killjoy.

This week's nemesis is Brian Urlacher's knee.  No matter how pleased or confident I am about any Bears' season there always looms over my head some delicate aspect of the team that threatens to shift the weight of the team bus just enough to send it plummeting off the cliffside to a fiery death below.  Last year, though i perceived it to be the offensive line, it was an injury to Jay Cutler.  This year, it looks to be the aging joint of our middle linebacker.

This week's lesson learned is to reread any written assignments for a class you prepare while watching a football game.  I nearly submitted a bunch of half sentences and gibberish and I'm pretty sure a subconscious reference to proper tackling form to my online class in my distraction.  Thank God I checked it over at halftime.

This week's analysis charts my feelings about my home team after years of wins and losses and notices a pretty predictable pattern:

This week's Star Wars quote is, "Only Imperial Storm Troopers are so precise."

That's all for this wee.  Thanks as always for reading.

We Labor Through This Week's Features

It's time to dive right into the weekly features with the top five ways to celebrate Labor Day (there's still time left):

5. Play video games - The countries where these things are made, for the most part, do not have the same kind of labor restrictions that we do.  So what better way to celebrate the time off from work by enjoying the fruits of someone else's sixteen hour days of labor?

4. Have a Jimmy Hoffa scavenger hunt - The first one to find the Teamster leader's remains wins!

3. Force your children (if you have any) to do chores - Child labor laws are just one of the many things of which Labor Day celebrates the institution.  But that doesn't mean you can't make them sweat like little slaves around the house every now and then.  Your grass is long and that car needs washing.

2. Ceremoniously place your white clothing into storage - No wearing white after Labor Day.  This could also be interpreted as the burial ceremony of summer.

1. Relax - It's your day off.  You deserve it.

This week's cool-ass thing you will never own is a real Plants vs Zombies pinball table.  The virtual table will be released tomorrow for the Zen's Pinball FX2, but wouldn't it be awesome to play it on a real life table.  Alas, the technology to have the undead rise form its tilted surface and shamble toward your flippers is just a little ways off yet.

This week's sign you are a nerd is that over 50% of the glassware in your home has comic or science fiction characters printed on it.  I have fond memories of growing up drinking out of the Burger King collectable Star Wars glasses, complete with lad based paint.  Now, as I break our grown up looking drinking glasses one by one over time (accidentally, of course) I have been replacing them with similar pint glasses with Marvel, DC and Star Wars imagery emblazoned upon them.

This week's nemesis is my giant fingers.  If I had a dollar for every time I mistype something because my enormous fingers accidentally mashed several buttons on my keyboard at once I would have had seven dollars by the time I finished writing this gag.

This week's lesson learned is to check expiration dates.  The food you swore must still be good will be prevented from tearing your stomach lining to shreds.  The wait in the drive-thru will be less embarrassing when you don't have your coupons handed back to you and have to pay full price.  Your driver's license will still be valid when you get pulled over.  The dates are printed on these things for a reason.  We ought to pay closer attention to them.

This week's analysis examines what we find in our Lego storage containers:

Aaaaannnnnd, this week's Star wars quote is, "Fear will keep the local systems in line."

Happy Labor Day.  Thanks for reading.

Back to Weekly Features

It was a busy weekend for us here at Transformer Generation Dad.  Work happened, then happened some more, time got wasted in front of some old video games (and some new ones) and then there was the whole getting the kids ready for school business.  But, at long last we are back from those pesky distractions and prepared to update the weekly features.

This week’s top five list consists of things that make the first day of school more stressful for me than for my sons:

5. Parking – I swear that on the first day of school there are two cars per enrolled child.

4. My snooze alarm – Perhaps the worst possible invention in the history of mankind, it allows one to circumvent a far more useful invention that was purposely devised to get your lazy ass out of bed on time and not make your children late for their first day.

3. Crowds – Braving the masses for a cool event like the premier of The Avengers is one thing, but being cramped up with a bunch of other sweaty people just to take you kid to school causes some serious panic on my part.

2. Flashbacks – All of the uncomfortable and stressful moments from my school career inevitably come rushing back to me on that fateful morning and I find myself trying to impart nuggets of fatherly wisdom on the short drive to school.  “Try your best.  Don’t be afraid to raise your hand if you know the answer.  No trading at lunch.  Stand up to bullies.  You put on some deodorant, right?”

1. Trying to remember other parents’ names – Since the last time I saw them at the beginning of June, so very much information has flown from my head.  I likely remember who their kid is, because of the incessant stories heard from my sons.  It doesn’t matter that I’m pretty sure they don’t remember mine either.  I try to hold myself to a higher standard.

Post-Olympalyptic Features

It is long past due to update the weekly features (which have been anything but weekly…maybe weakly?) and without a running theme to base them all this week, let’s just dive right into them.

Life has its share of embarrassing moments, not the least of which is when you try to let a fart slip out silently and it makes a noise and somebody unexpectedly turns a corner.  You know they heard it and at that moment you have to make a split second decision.  Do you act like it was something else that made the noise or do you own up to it.  Assuming you choose the latter, here are a few one-liners to help defuse the tension of the awkward moment:

Olympic Weekly Features

The 2012 Summer Olympics have begun and our weekly features are designed to celebrate the majesty of sportsmanship and competition at its purest form.  Along those lines, our top five list consists of our top non-medal Olympic moments.

5. Jamaican bobsled team, Calgary 1998 – Not a summer Olympic moment, but a story of a group of athletes who dedicated themselves to a cause and kept at it.  More importantly, it resulted in a movie starring John Candy.  Oh, how I miss him.

4. John Stephen Akhwari, Mexico City 1968 – After a fall that resulted in a fracture in his leg during the marathon, this Tanzanian runner refused to quit and finally crossed the finish line after the winner had already finished over an hour earlier.

3. Kerstin Palm, Tokyo 1964 through Seoul 1988 – The Swedish fencer was the first woman to compete in seven, yes seven Olympic games.  What drove her to keep going for so long?  The love of the sport.  Palm never medaled, yet returned over and over again just to keep competing.

2. Lawrence Lemieux, Seoul 1988 – While in second place during a rowing competition, Lemieux saw two athletes from Singapore competing in another race simultaneously capsize in rough waters.  Lemieux quickly steered off the route and saved both men from drowning, sacrificing his place in the history books to help his fellow athlete.

1. Derek and Jim Redmond, Barcelona 1992 – The most inspiring and memorable Olympic moment ever, especially to a dad like me, came when injury plagued British sprinter Derek Redmond snapped his hamstring in the middle of a race and his father, Jim pushed past security in order to race to his son’s side and support him across the finish line.  Technically, Derek was disqualified, but it was a family victory in the end.

Same Bat-Blog, Same Bat-Features

The final movie of Christopher Nolan's Batman trilogy is out in theaters and I am going to overcompensate for my not having yet seen it by loading up this week's features with Batman and trilogy movie references.  It starts with our top five Batman villains...

5. Catwoman - An intriguing character in the Batman universe, but since she has become more of a part-time villain/anti-hero, she can't very well rank higher.

4. Bane - I'm a big fan of the strong, muscle-bound villains whom the hero must outthink.  Not having seen the film, I'm hearing that The Dark Knight Rises version of Bane is a bit different, so we shall see if the movie portrayal causes his stock to rise or fall in reference to this list.

3. Two Face - Another villain done differently in the films, I always liked the schizophrenic ex-DA in the comic books.

2. Riddler - Ok, he may have the worst get-up out of them all, an obnoxious green spandex one piece with question marks all over it, but his approach always got me.  I still find myself posing questions to my friends by starting, "Riddle me this, Batman..."

1. Joker - True sick, disturbed, evil mind and what better way to portray that than having hims resemble the most evil of God's creations, the clown.

July's First Features

Posting has been quite sparse here over the last month.  July has seen perhaps an all time low in regularity of my shared ranting.  After a week out of town, fishing in the north woods, I have decided to finally update the weekly features.  It begins with the top five ways I was able to notice (other than road signs) that I had returned to Illinois…

5. Lack of pine trees – The sprawling groups of tall pines begin to become less sprawling as you come closer to Illinois’ northern border and pretty much disappear by the time to you cross it.  It also gives way to…

4. Flatter terrain – Goodbye scenic bluffs of sandstone and rolling hills, hello boring flat fields of grass.

3. More lanes on the highway – The same interstate opens suddenly from two lanes into four most places and even more once you start reaching the tollbooths, which leads us to my next sign…

2. Tolls – You may have driven for four hundred and fifty miles for nothing more than the cost of your gas, but now the same stretch of road is going to cost you $1.95 every thirty miles or so.  Welcome home.

1. Terrible drivers – You would think that the open lanes and the tolls would combine for better traffic.  On the contrary, the whole slower traffic to the right thing just seems to fly out the window once you cross into my beloved Land of Lincoln (who was born in Kentucky).

The Most Hated of Features

Transformer Generation Dad is nearly done with its sports related ranting and prepared to resume regular posting, but let's hold on to the fervor just long enough to let it infect our weekly features.  It begins with the top five athletes I love to hate...


5. Aaron Rodgers - It would be enough for some that he stole my beloved Bears' shot at a Superbowl title in the 2011 NFC Championship Game.  Hell, it would be enough that he is a Packer for most Bears' fans.  But I never hated Brett Favre the way I hate Rodgers and that is because of the celebration.  That stupid heavyweight title belt motion he does after touchdowns really makes me wish bad things on the man.


4. Lebron James - Once again, more than what he means to my hometown team's shot at a title, I despise this guy for the way he carries himself, the things he says, his classless demeanor.  Any athlete that walks off a court without shaking the hands of the team that beat him is enough to make me dislike him forever.  Add the self-important decision announcement, the pep rally, the sour grapes comments and you have one of sports' current biggest douche bags.


3. Isaiah Thomas - So he hasn't been in the league for a long time.  Still, this goes back to the not shaking hands after a loss thing.  It also to do with being cocky, sexist and turning your back on a good friend once he is diagnosed with HIV.  How's that front office gig working out for you Isaiah?  Oh, never mind.


2. Barry Bonds - The real shame is that this guy was a five tool, complete, hall of fame caliber player hands down before he started juicing.  Then his head and feet grew in his mid-thirties and he started hitting home runs at a super human rate.  Claiming innocence and treating the general public like their stupid clinched it.


1. Mark McGwire - This one is personal.  As a kid, I worshiped Big Mac.  He was always a big guy so I even held out hope in the midst of the steroid scandal that maybe he wasn't taking performance enhancing drugs.  Then his weeping, non-denial testimony clinched it and I was done.  You suck, cheater.

New Weekly Features...That's What I'm Afraid Of.

As usual, I am behind on updating the weekly features, so let’s get right into it to make up for lost time and not get all nostalgic and mushy on me, okay?

This week’s top five list is important lessons that dads tend to teach that moms just don’t for some reason:

5. How to sleep in a recliner – Step one: work to the point of exhaustion.  It pretty much handles itself from there.

4. Burping – It needs to come from the diaphragm.  Bass and length are the keys to success.

3. Auto maintenance – Change the oil every three thousand miles and if a light comes on, do not think it will go away eventually.

2. How to throw a ball (not like a girl) – This is especially impressive for dads with daughters out there.

1. How to sound like you know more about sports than you really do – Dads can give you quality stock lines like talking about out kicking the coverage, the growing lack of dominant centers and putting the puck on net to name a few.  This also comes in very handy with item #2 on our list.

The Father of All Weekly Features

It’s June and since self-obsession runs rampant here at Transformer Generation Dad the whole month is all about Father’s Day.  The build up, the celebration and the afterglow take up all thirty glorious summer days.  We say summer days even though the solstice isn’t until twenty days into the month, but who needs to be that precise?

Must…resist…precision.

Anyway, this week’s features begin celebrating dads by naming our top five favorite comic book fathers.

5. Odin – The All-Father practices tough love to be sure, but ultimately he teaches his son Thor how to be worthy of the power he possesses.  Add in the gift of one kick ass hammer and the adoption of one of his sworn enemy’s runt children and the gruff, one-eyed, bearded old coot seems like a big softy.

4. Magneto – I know we all might say it, but how many of you would be willing to wage a full scale war with the human race in order to protect the future of your kids?

3. Reed Richards – You can’t by your kids’ love, but if you are the one and only Mr. Fantastic inventing super awesome gadgets and allowing them to travel throughout the galaxy might be a way to bribe love out of them.

2. Jor-El – Scientist and savior of his only son.  He even provided his boy with the ultimate tree house so that he had somewhere to escape with his thoughts (and nudie magazines…they don’t show that part in the comic books).

1. Rick Grimes – When the chips are down and the mindless hordes are advancing, the true mettle of a father is tested.  Through loss of limbs as well as countless friends, family members and acquaintances, Rick has stayed focused on the two fundamental principles of fatherhood.  Protect your son and cultivate his ability to slaughter zombies.

Rediscovered Weekly Features

With the busy start to the summer, I am further behind than usual in updating our weekly features.  The good news is that my house cleaning and organization projects have resulted in my setting up my old Nintendo systems in my man-cave, so let’s begin with the top 5 Super Nintendo games I have rediscovered:

5. NBA Jam – Subsequent incarnations of this game never lived up to the original high flying, ball incinerating good time that the original held.  And all the old school players remind me of what the NBA used to be at its peak.

4. TMNT: Turtles in Time – The best TMNT game on a home console.  It’s just a shame the SNES could only accommodate 2 controllers.

3. Super Mario World – The flagship game when the new system was released is still one of the best Mario games of all time.  The cape was a great addition.

2. Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past – The last of the great “overhead view” adventure games.  This game also introduced a lot of amazing weapons and gadgets that continue to inspire future editions of the Zelda franchise.

1. NHL ’93 – The most replayable of all the games I personally own.  Any game that’s nearly 20 years old and can still make you sweat and make your thumbs sore must be amazing.

Return of the Weekly Features

My youngest son turned eight yesterday and the weekend festivities left me little time to reflect on just what an amazing addition he has been to my family.  My need obsessive to write blog posts doesn't leave me with much time today either, so the least I can do for the best little brother I know (I come in a close second) is to pay homage by making this week's top five list a collection of my favorite pop culture brothers:


5. The Blues Brothers - Jake and Elwood Blues are a bit outdated now, but I remember my cousin and I looking forward to family weddings only because it gave us the opportunity to showcase our Blues Brothers routine on the dance floor.


4. The Hanson Brothers - Another older movie that means little to the current generation, but the three brothers from Slap Shot were classic.  My favorite scene came when Paul Newman walked in on them in the hotel room playing with their race cars.


3. The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - You know what they say, the family that mutates together grows to study ninjutsu, eat pizza and fight both teenage angst and underground japanese gangs together.


2. Thor & Loki - With The Avengers blowing up the box office, the God of Thunder and his adoptive brother are a hot pair right now.  But as a lifelong lover of the Avengers, I have to appreciate how the sibling rivalry between these two brought the team together in the first place.


1. Mario & Luigi - They started out looking more like twin brothers and their appearances changed dramatically over the years.  Since then, they have run through dungeons, explored new galaxies, battled ghosts, won go-kart tournaments and played countless sports together all while repeatedly saving one another's lives.  That's brotherly love.

Scores of Weekly Features

The portion of my weekend that wasn’t spent watching The Avengers multiple times was spent reliving the glory that was watching The Avengers via discussions with my sons and other fellow fans.  However, watching the movie led me to a grave realization.

For all the special effects that have been added to super hero films, there is one thing that has all but disappeared.  The soundtracks of these films rely more heavily on popular bands creating music for them instead of an iconic orchestral score.  The memorable super hero theme songs seem to be a lost art and I, for one, miss them.  And so, I have decided to make the best of the super hero theme songs the subject of this week’s top five.

The Longest Week's Features

There is but one thing on my mind this week.  Anyone who knows me (or read our last post) ought to realize that is the upcoming release of The Avengers this Friday.  My excitement has left me unable to keep from talking about the potential of the film, remembering what it was that I walked into the other room for or get a decent night’s sleep.

In an effort to calm myself down, I have tried to remind myself that not everything Avengers related has always been a hit in my book (and that doesn’t even include the Ralph Fiennes and Uma Thurman movie from 1998).  Thus, while the weekly features will be Avengers-laden, our top five list looks to temper my fan-boy instinct by chronicling the five lamest Avengers in my opinion complete with the link to their page on the Mrvel Universe site.